pirates of the caribbean was a pretty good movie, although i was a bit disappointed at how corny all of the jokes were. or was everything just less funny in that era? i also didn’t believe how easily resolved everything was at the end. but, then, that’s what i get for anticipating a realistic resolution from a movie whose origins lie in a disneyland theme park ride.

the main female character is hot, and i’m saying this in a very low-key les-bionic way. keira knightley is like a more gorgeous natalie portman and a less criminally inclined winona ryder.

orlando bloom finally ditched the peroxide and sported a brunette ponytail that would only usually suit men living in beat-up trailers or in prison. nonetheless, in true bloom fashion, he captures the heart of the [hot] heroine with the flick of his sword. no, his real sword.

you know what they say about men with big swords…

the film also re-established johnny depp’s position on my list of favourite men. he makes the sexiest pirate i’ve ever seen — and i’ve seen many (i.e., the ugmos down at the local mall). i think i could have done without the two braids of chin pubes, though. at times, he swaggered and slurred like a drunken sailor, but i suppose that just made his portrayal of a castaway pirate all the more convincing.

pirates: - jokes + - ending + (hot x 3) = a decent summer movie